Why why WHY is it only wednesday!!!
this week seems to be going by SOOOO SLLOOOWWW.... i keep thinking its thursday.. but nope! its not. its only Hump day... Sigh.... that means i still have one more day to go of my work week which i know will be hilaciously slow because my doc is not going to be here tomorrow... Bleck....
Oh Wellss...
SO! Here are my tentative plans for the rest of the week.. got a lot going on!
ThUrSdAy: Go to work, Get off work, go to dinner with some work buddies, then go see my friends band play at Burts Tiki lounge.. Then either stay in SLC or go home. Not sure yet.
On Friday i have my doctors appointment, to find out what my labs and ultra sound said. and what my labs said... so wish me luck....
Then i want to go buy a cute outfit for my friends birthday party... and i need some new jeans. Mine are all bleck...
So Saturday i will probably hang out with my buddy Kat :) (if she is not working) and then go to my friend Dre's birthday party.. Thus the new outfit.. she wants everyone to dress nice, Just to be fun and different. :)
Sunday i will probably relax.... and then Back to work on monday... BOOO
So needless to say... wont have alot of sit and be lazy time this weekend, but thats ok :)
Wednesday, April 7, 2010
Work Work Work...
Ahh… The dawn of a New Era in my work life… J
We have a little extern working here right now…. And if they decide to hire her, Then I will no longer have to work for GYN any longer…. I have just about Had it with that team and was almost to the point of quitting because I felt so unappreciated and so just ugh… I had worked pretty much by myself for 3 months while my co-worker was out on FMLA. SO she was back ONE day…. And the next week I came back into work to just get reamed and ripped to shreds by my employer. Saying that Dr. soisson was not happy with my work and that I was a horrible MA, and that I had a month to improve or I would not be able to work GYN anymore and my hours would be cut…. I pretty much lost it.. I was so angry… because 1st of all.. I have worked here for 2 years.. TWO YEARS! And not once had I EVER heard that Dr. soisson was not “pleased” with my work….. so its like! WTF where did THAT come from?!?!?! They told me that I was not getting pts in room on time and not stocking good enough… Well DUH.. again can I repeat myself?? No help.. THREE months…. I can only do so much by myself… So… anyway… None the less… I walked out of work that day… almost quit… Pretty much told my boss that if I was not needed I wanted to go home. I was so beyond livid…. So Later on that week I went in and talked to her once I had calmed down… and told her that I didn’t WANT to work for GYN anymore.. my thought process was why work for a doctor and for nurses that cant and wont respect me as a person. When I can work for Vicki (my breast team nurse) who absolutely adores me as a person and as a medical assistant.
I was promised that when the time came for budgets that I could be taken off the GyN team and moved over to work solely with Vicki. And now that we have the little Extern, I think they are talking about hiring her. And so 2 weeks ago they had me only work soisson for half a day then I went to work for my breast nurse.. Then Last week I did not working him at all J I am so excited!!! I think I will be WAY LESS stressed, and happier here…
We have a little extern working here right now…. And if they decide to hire her, Then I will no longer have to work for GYN any longer…. I have just about Had it with that team and was almost to the point of quitting because I felt so unappreciated and so just ugh… I had worked pretty much by myself for 3 months while my co-worker was out on FMLA. SO she was back ONE day…. And the next week I came back into work to just get reamed and ripped to shreds by my employer. Saying that Dr. soisson was not happy with my work and that I was a horrible MA, and that I had a month to improve or I would not be able to work GYN anymore and my hours would be cut…. I pretty much lost it.. I was so angry… because 1st of all.. I have worked here for 2 years.. TWO YEARS! And not once had I EVER heard that Dr. soisson was not “pleased” with my work….. so its like! WTF where did THAT come from?!?!?! They told me that I was not getting pts in room on time and not stocking good enough… Well DUH.. again can I repeat myself?? No help.. THREE months…. I can only do so much by myself… So… anyway… None the less… I walked out of work that day… almost quit… Pretty much told my boss that if I was not needed I wanted to go home. I was so beyond livid…. So Later on that week I went in and talked to her once I had calmed down… and told her that I didn’t WANT to work for GYN anymore.. my thought process was why work for a doctor and for nurses that cant and wont respect me as a person. When I can work for Vicki (my breast team nurse) who absolutely adores me as a person and as a medical assistant.
I was promised that when the time came for budgets that I could be taken off the GyN team and moved over to work solely with Vicki. And now that we have the little Extern, I think they are talking about hiring her. And so 2 weeks ago they had me only work soisson for half a day then I went to work for my breast nurse.. Then Last week I did not working him at all J I am so excited!!! I think I will be WAY LESS stressed, and happier here…
Tuesday, April 6, 2010
i wrote this... and i kinda like it...
One of Those days
Today is one of those days
I have them from time to time
Where life feels SOO overwhelming
I just want to run and Hide.
Why cant i live in a fantasy land
Where all is right and good
And ignore all this reality
That consumes me like quicksand.
There is so much death and sickness here
too much for me to handle
So much is whirling in my head
Leaving me full of fear.
I am afraid of whats to come about
Afraid of facing facts
All this information surrounding me
just makes me want to ScReAm and ShOuT!
Today is one of ThOsE days
I have them from time to time.....
Today is one of those days
I have them from time to time
Where life feels SOO overwhelming
I just want to run and Hide.
Why cant i live in a fantasy land
Where all is right and good
And ignore all this reality
That consumes me like quicksand.
There is so much death and sickness here
too much for me to handle
So much is whirling in my head
Leaving me full of fear.
I am afraid of whats to come about
Afraid of facing facts
All this information surrounding me
just makes me want to ScReAm and ShOuT!
Today is one of ThOsE days
I have them from time to time.....
Sunday, April 4, 2010
Sigh....
Whelps.... Alot has gone on the last few days in my life...
I went to the Doctor on friday to go over my CT scan.... Walked in there confident... walked out of there crushed...
I not only have one nodule now.. i have two.... i dont know what that means...but i have to go BACK to my pulmo and see if i need to have it Biopsied.... My PRimary Care doc doesnt want me to keep having CT scans. She doesnt think that it is healthy for me to keep having them when i am in child bearing Years....
And...... Now the part that really freaked me out...Also.. my CT scan showed some things on my liver and now my Pancreas.... and sooo much was thrown at me in one setting that it was alot to handle... I will let you know more when i know more... but its scaring me... i swear if its not one thing its another... Sigh... But i have to have an ultrasound done on tuesday.. and then i will see my doctor again on friday. ugh... So nervracking..
I had a blessing yesterday, and that has helped me ba calmer... but yeah... So i guess i will end this for now.. Happy Easter!
I went to the Doctor on friday to go over my CT scan.... Walked in there confident... walked out of there crushed...
I not only have one nodule now.. i have two.... i dont know what that means...but i have to go BACK to my pulmo and see if i need to have it Biopsied.... My PRimary Care doc doesnt want me to keep having CT scans. She doesnt think that it is healthy for me to keep having them when i am in child bearing Years....
And...... Now the part that really freaked me out...Also.. my CT scan showed some things on my liver and now my Pancreas.... and sooo much was thrown at me in one setting that it was alot to handle... I will let you know more when i know more... but its scaring me... i swear if its not one thing its another... Sigh... But i have to have an ultrasound done on tuesday.. and then i will see my doctor again on friday. ugh... So nervracking..
I had a blessing yesterday, and that has helped me ba calmer... but yeah... So i guess i will end this for now.. Happy Easter!
Sunday, March 28, 2010
Ahh.... Good weekend.. not ready for it to be Over
Whelps! Not only did i do everything i set out to accomplish this week, but i got some nice little R&R and a new hair cut!!! :)
I went to see my old roomie on friday after my chiro appointment and decided to have her cut my hair the next day :) i was there for a REALLY long time. but its ok becuase she was new and had never done MY kind of hair cut yet. But she did a Great job! :) i am proud of her! She is going to hair school and is still learning... but she done good :) PLUS! i got 2 colors and a cut and wash and style for 60! how can you beat that!
Today we did easter a BIT early since the parentals are leaving me next week... So that was fun. We had good food and gave my neice shyleigh her easter basket which was fun :)
NOT ready to go back to work but oh well thats life :)
here are some pictures of my hair and my flower that i am getting much better at making :) More craft pictures will come :) my cross stitch is really coming along!!!
I am now watching did you hear about the morgans till i fall asleep... so goodnight friends and vast internet world!!! LOVES!
MaRy
My Neice Shy Shy
The Flower i made
My New Hair Cut
My New Hair Color!
Saturday, March 27, 2010
Ah... The world of Crafting :)
I feel OOBER accomplished today. Pretty much did everything on my list yesterday! I went to the chiropractor to get adjusted and am feeling MUCH better.
Then i stopped by and talked to my old roomie today.. She is going to do my hair tomorrow if she can get me in for an apointment :) I hope she does a good job. She is still in school. so i am trusting her ALOT :)
After that i met up with kat, Jen and Fern and we did Crafting all night lol :) I learned how to make cool flowers and am now attempting cross stiching :) Pictures will come soon!!!!
It was just an overall nice day. Days like this really help me when i am in a funk like i have been.
Whelps... This is a short entry... But its 2 am... i should really sleep! THANKS JEN! for letting me crash here on your lovely couch.. wont lie.. MISS the BED ;)
And kat and fern! when you read this! thanks for a GREAT night!
peace love and chicken grease!!! MUAH!!!
Then i stopped by and talked to my old roomie today.. She is going to do my hair tomorrow if she can get me in for an apointment :) I hope she does a good job. She is still in school. so i am trusting her ALOT :)
After that i met up with kat, Jen and Fern and we did Crafting all night lol :) I learned how to make cool flowers and am now attempting cross stiching :) Pictures will come soon!!!!
It was just an overall nice day. Days like this really help me when i am in a funk like i have been.
Whelps... This is a short entry... But its 2 am... i should really sleep! THANKS JEN! for letting me crash here on your lovely couch.. wont lie.. MISS the BED ;)
And kat and fern! when you read this! thanks for a GREAT night!
peace love and chicken grease!!! MUAH!!!
Thursday, March 25, 2010
Ahhhh... Ode to the End of the Working WEEK
Whelps Another day another dollar.... This week has been SOO challenging for me! i have been so exhausted! and it seemed to drag ON AND ON... But oh well... its done now :) So now i have the weekend to play relaxe and just take some breathers..
First on the Agenda... Watch Six Feet under... which i am doing RIGHT now :) lol
Next!!! Get some WELL needed sleep..... (which will come eventually tonight)
THEN! wake up and do SOMETHING in the AM..
Then get a LOVELY massage and adjustment... mmmm love getting massages :)
Then i will spend an evening crafting and watching movies with Kat and Jen :)
Then the rest of the weekend will most likely be spent in Grantsville with my peeps out here :)
does that not sound like a totally productive weekend?
Oh... P.S.... I have not techically talked to my doctor yet, but i did look at my scan.. and i THINK that everything is the same... i STILL have my nodule, but as far as i could tell it is about the same :) so HERE is to HOPE :)
Whelps!!! i am off to finish watching MY show :) so i will get back on here soon! Loves you all :) MUAH
First on the Agenda... Watch Six Feet under... which i am doing RIGHT now :) lol
Next!!! Get some WELL needed sleep..... (which will come eventually tonight)
THEN! wake up and do SOMETHING in the AM..
Then get a LOVELY massage and adjustment... mmmm love getting massages :)
Then i will spend an evening crafting and watching movies with Kat and Jen :)
Then the rest of the weekend will most likely be spent in Grantsville with my peeps out here :)
does that not sound like a totally productive weekend?
Oh... P.S.... I have not techically talked to my doctor yet, but i did look at my scan.. and i THINK that everything is the same... i STILL have my nodule, but as far as i could tell it is about the same :) so HERE is to HOPE :)
Whelps!!! i am off to finish watching MY show :) so i will get back on here soon! Loves you all :) MUAH
Wednesday, March 24, 2010
GaH!!!! My NeRvEs ArE AtTaCkIng ME!!!
GAH!
So I am having my CT scan today which I have already had two of. Last year when I was REALLY sick and ended up in the ER, they did a CT scan of my lungs and found a nodule in my left lung. I was pretty much freaking out about it. it was really scary for me because I did not know what that meant for a long time.. hell the doctors still don't know why it is there. So I have to have routine CT's for the next little while to make sure that it has not grown.. If it gets bigger, we will have something to worry about but if it stays the same they think I will be just fine. So Needless to say, I get really nervous and up tight about it when the time comes... I wonder if that has been part of my problems lately... I have a tendency to get depressed when I worry about things. and I Definitely worry about this.. every time. Plus I hate getting them. I feel all Claustrophobic in them.. thank GOD its not an MRI right?? then I would REALLY be all weirded out. those take FOREVER!
So Wish me luck all! Im sure I will be fine.. but its just so nerve racking!
So I am having my CT scan today which I have already had two of. Last year when I was REALLY sick and ended up in the ER, they did a CT scan of my lungs and found a nodule in my left lung. I was pretty much freaking out about it. it was really scary for me because I did not know what that meant for a long time.. hell the doctors still don't know why it is there. So I have to have routine CT's for the next little while to make sure that it has not grown.. If it gets bigger, we will have something to worry about but if it stays the same they think I will be just fine. So Needless to say, I get really nervous and up tight about it when the time comes... I wonder if that has been part of my problems lately... I have a tendency to get depressed when I worry about things. and I Definitely worry about this.. every time. Plus I hate getting them. I feel all Claustrophobic in them.. thank GOD its not an MRI right?? then I would REALLY be all weirded out. those take FOREVER!
So Wish me luck all! Im sure I will be fine.. but its just so nerve racking!
Monday, March 22, 2010
ThE HaTrEd oF ChAsE
Well... what a day! i feel like i accomplished alot today! i am on my way to changing banks.. i HATE chase! i dont like how they do business, and since my debit card got StoLen this past weekend, there customer service has really made me hate them more. SO Today i got off work a little early, and went to Mountain America to set up my account. :) I ALSO got approved for a visa credit card! which means that my credit is FINALLY getting better after i screwed it up a few years ago being dumb and stupid with my credit. So WOOT WOOT to me :)
I also am almost ready to close my other account with CHASE so i dont have to deal with them anymore!! and i should get my refund from when my card got stolen and used in the next few days.
I am still feeling Blah.. but i know that i will get over it eventually...i get in these slumps sometimes and i always find my way out.. it just takes me some time.... i think part of it has to do with being here in this small town... where i just am out of my element of the big city. but eventually that will calm down too.. i hope... I just need my friends to stand by me and be there to help pull me out. :)
But other than the crappy stuff that has been going on in life. Things are going ok. Work has been decent... Not GREAT by any means but decent.....
Whelps that is really all i have to say for today.... unless i think of something else to say :) i am finally watching LOST.. and i am LOST! so i better pay attention lol :) Night all!
I also am almost ready to close my other account with CHASE so i dont have to deal with them anymore!! and i should get my refund from when my card got stolen and used in the next few days.
I am still feeling Blah.. but i know that i will get over it eventually...i get in these slumps sometimes and i always find my way out.. it just takes me some time.... i think part of it has to do with being here in this small town... where i just am out of my element of the big city. but eventually that will calm down too.. i hope... I just need my friends to stand by me and be there to help pull me out. :)
But other than the crappy stuff that has been going on in life. Things are going ok. Work has been decent... Not GREAT by any means but decent.....
Whelps that is really all i have to say for today.... unless i think of something else to say :) i am finally watching LOST.. and i am LOST! so i better pay attention lol :) Night all!
Sunday, March 21, 2010
WoWzA
Whelps! This is my first official Blog in this world of Blogging! i doubt that any one will ever read my random thoughts... but at the same time i feel comforted by that! that way i can say what i want when i want with no regrets..
So i am 23... and i just moved home. I think that for now it was the best decison for me because i am hopin to save some money so that i have some padding when i go back to school in the fall... The problem with this... is that i now liv e an hour away from my life.. from work, friends any chance i have a meeting someone special.. becuase im pretty sure its down right impossible to meet anyone in this little po dunk town. I just have to keep telling myself that it is temporary... But none the less... I think that everything will work out money wise with me being here for now... But i miss my friends... even though i still see them i miss being able to be like, HEY! im bored! wanna hang out! and only being 10 minutes away.
ANYWAY.... I also miss one of my bestest buddies.. Who i think should be coming home ANY DAY NOW lol (that was wishful thinking lol) My bestie Jacob is out of the state for work.. he will be gone for a long time, and i miss him :( he cheers me up when i am really down. So come home soon loser! i want to plaY!!!
Whelps guys! this is it! Thats all i have to say for now! But this is me! and like my title says... Its Just Life... but its MY life...
PEACE :)
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